Friday, September 28, 2012
Facebook status sms
Height Of Facebook Update: “Suhaag Raat Hain Ghunghat Utha Raha Hoon Main” …………………….. 25 Likes, And…………….. 1 Comment, “Keep On Updating We Are Online“
Facebook status sms
Similarity between FACEBOOK & JAIL: In both cases people sit, waste time and write on Walls!
Facebook status sms
Dad joined facebook. Kid`s status update: "Dad on FB, wtf!" Dad commented, "What is wtf?" Kid replied him, "Welcome to Facebook!"
Facebook status sms
FACEBOOK PAPER Q1 . Define add as friend ? Q2 . What does status means ? Q3 . What do u mean by poke ? Q4 . Give two reasons for liking the girls comments ? Q5 . What is pic tag ? Q6 . What is inbox msg ? Q7 . Give details of info ? Q8 . Draw a profile pic ? Q9 . What is page ? And why we prmote it . Give reasons ? Q10 . Define comments on post ?
Facebook status sms
Girl's status on Facebook: "Feeling sad!" 17021 comments. . . Boy's status: "Going to commit suicide!" 2 likes and 1 comment-"Can I take your bike"!
Student
Yahoooooo !!!! Exams ki sari tayyari ho gayi (';') Pen Pencil Scale Eraser Uniform ID Card Sub tayyar hay, Ab bus . Parhna baqi hay
Student
Connect wit dis: I am an Engineering student because- I can write 50 words per minute bt i cant read my own handwritin..! I spend more time with my calculator than with my family..! My IQ is greater than my weight..! I explain 3 yr olds, why dsky is blue using terms like scattering, interference & diffraction..! I know second law of thermodynamics bt not my shirt size..! I think in "maths" I can translate english into binary..! I consider any non-science course "easy" An 40/100 is heaven2me. My xerox bills soar higher dan my pocket money!:p be proud 2 b one!!!!
Student
Na K.T. ki parwah he, na sbjcts koi CLEAR he, Fir b yaron hum ENGINER he .. Na job ki tension na future ka koi FEAR he, Fir b yaron hum Engineer he .. Table pr kitab ki jagh kingfishr ki BEER he, Fir b yaron hm Engineer he . C++ ya JAVA nahi, chating apna CARRER he, Fir b yaron hm Engineer he . Ma ne socha tha ki mere beta ENGINEER banega Le MA aj tera beta ENGINEER hi to he Lekin zara hatke bana hai Dedicated to all my engg frnds..
Student
*Engineering Truth* "The person who knows best about the exam syllabus is the guy who runs a Xerox Center" :-P :-)
Jokess
5 ways to catch a tiger 1.Newtons law: Allow the tiger to catch you, then you catch the tiger 2.Einstein law: Chase the tiger until the tiger becomes tired, then you catch the tiger . 3.Inverse law: Get into a cage kept near a tiger. Then take the inverse. 4Veerappan's law: Kidnap tiger's wife & threaten the tiger to surrender. 5 Police method: Catch a cat & beat it until it agrees that it is a tiger 8-)
Jokess
Teachr-Bus k Driver aur conductor me kya fark He? Stdnt-Conductor soya to kisika ticket Nahi katega & Driver soya to sabka ticket kat jayega..
Jokess
Wife= agr me kho jau, to tum kya kroge husband=me nirmal baba ke pas jauga wife=baba se kya kahoge husband=baba kirpa aani suru ho gyi h
Jokess
English Class. . Kid: Me Sleep With Dad Last Night . Madam Corrected: No Beta, I Slept With Dad Last Night . Kid: Aap Mere Sone Ke Baad Aayi Hongi..:p
Jokess
Boy Was in a Park behind a Tree with his GF. Old Man: Bete, Kya Ye Hamari Sanskriti hai ? Boy: Nahi uncle! ye Pallavi hai, Aap Dusre Ped ke Peeche Check Karo !!
Funny....
Secretary: Sir aap muje naukri se nikal toh nahi rahe?? Boss: Nahi, par tumhe kisne kaha? Secrtary: Wo aapne Cabin se sofa aur Bed hatwa diya na Isliye,
Funny....
ANY TIME, ANY PROBLEM, ANY HELP, JUST GIVE ME ONE MISS CALL I ll "give u another "miss call" and we'll play miscall miscall !! :p
Funny....
Photographer studio me chote bache se: "Meri taraf dekho beta is camera se kabutar niklega." Bacha: "Focus adjust kar gawaaro wali baat mat kar, Portrait Mode use kriyo Macro ke saath, High Resolution may pic aani chaiye warna paise nahi milenge SAALA . kabutar nikalegaa" !!! :P
Funny....
Photographer studio me chote bache se: "Meri taraf dekho beta is camera se kabutar niklega." Bacha: "Focus adjust kar gawaaro wali baat mat kar, Portrait Mode use kriyo Macro ke saath, High Resolution may pic aani chaiye warna paise nahi milenge SAALA . kabutar nikalegaa" !!! :P
Funny....
PJ TYM:- What is superman's fav song?!?! . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . Hawa mein udta jaye mera lal duppata malmal ka !! B-)
Coollll
Awesomest~ No matter how Many gorgeous faces u set your eyes upon, if you already set your heart for someone you wil hardly notice anyone..!!
Coollll
Seven use full tips for Employees for success and survival in the best way : 1. Bane raho pagla, kaam karega agla. 2. Bane raho dull, salary milegi full. 3. Jisne lee tension, uski wife ko mil gyi pension. 4. Kaam se daro nahi par kaam koi karo nahi. 5. Kaam karo ya na karo, kaam ki fikr jaroor karo. 6. Kamm ki fikr karo ya na karo, par boss se fikr ki zikr jaroor karo. 7. Jo kaam kare usko ungli karo aur jo naa kare uski chugli karo. Be proud to be employee!!!!!!
Coollll
The maxima of my life became the point of inflexion without differentiation of pain which is in term of multiple of log. And you says that "YOUR MATHS FOR LOVE IS WEAK" . But i says I AM NOT FAKE MY LOVE ONLY YOUR ANGLE OF ELEVATION CHANGED
Coollll
A Painter draws a Painting "Door of Heart" without handle, Man: y der is no handle? Painter:Itz bcoz Door of Heart opens frm Inside not outside.! Gud mrng
Coollll
Great Fact: She needs a man with a good future.. He needs a woman with a good past.. .. gud nyt.
Coollll
Read n understand itz nt vulgar: Humble request to scientists: "Plz invent a condom for the heart. . . Coz sumtimes ppl fuck the feelings badly!" :>
Coollll
Taj Mahal ko dekh ke bola shahjahn ka pota.. . . Taj Mahal ko dekh ke bola shahjahn ka pota.. . . . . . . Ajj humara bhi bank balance hota agar buddha ishq mai pagal na hota XD
Coollll
Only two types of communications are the fastest in the world . .. From email to email; And female to female.
Tuesday, September 11, 2012
Friendship
People like U are found only once in a lifetime. So U better take care of yourself because I don t want to waste another lifetime to find a such a SWEET Friend
Friendship
Good Friends are like software. They enter ur life; scan ur problems; edit ur tensions; download ur solutions; delete ur worries and save u in their heart!
I love u
Sweet i am, but honey is you !! Image is mine, but colours are you !! Flower i am, but fragnance is you Happy i am, but the reason is u... I Love U
I love u
I love your dark eyes, And your curly hair, I love your smile, And the way that you care. I love your deep kisses, I love your soft touch, I love you, I love you, I love you so much.
I love u
I may not gt to see you as often as I like. I may not gt to hold u in my arms all through d night. But deep in my heart I truely know, you're d one that i love! Love U Sweetheart!
I love u
A cute proposal by a boy to his lover :) My name is "I":-) My problem is "LOVE":-) My solution is "YOU":-)
I love u
In your eyes....... I see my dreams.... In your warmth..... I feel my love....... In your arms...... I found my world..... I LOVE YOU
I love u
I have the "I", I have the "L", I have the "O", I have the "V", I have the "E", So pls can I have "U"?
Facebook sms
Facebook fever: Once a guy updated his status: "I m gonna sleep In Garden tonight" . . After sometime... . . . 17 mosquitoes liked his status :-D
Facebook sms
Dad writes on son's Facebook wall: Dear Son, How are you? All is fine here. We miss you a lot. . . . . . . Please!! TURN OFF THE COMPUTER & COME DOWN FOR DINNER!!!
Facebook sms
Why is Facebook such a hit? Bcoz it works on the principle that, "People are more interested in others' life rather than their own".
Facebook sms
!!..Facebook Saves Life..!! :D A depressed college Student went to Railway Track for Suicide .. . Train was Coming Closer and He Suddenly came out of the track and Said . . . ''Oh Shitt !! Forgot to Update status In Facebook that Im Gonna Die'' :D
Facebook sms
Only 1% girls become wives of their lovers. The remaining 99% become their Facebook passwords!
Facebook sms
Ques: What Is Will-Power? Ans: It's When You See 10 Notification, 20 msg & 30 Frnd Reqeust, And Still You Click . . . . . . . . . "LOGOUT"
Facebook sms
Modern Definition 0f " Boy Friend " A Person Who Has To Like All The Status And Photos 0f His Girl Friend No Matter How Bad They Are . . . :P
Facebook sms
Boy: My Ex-Girlfriend's Status On Facebook Says: "Standing On The Edge of A Cliff..." Friend: So What Did You Comment? Boy: Nothing, I Just Poked Her :P
Facebook sms
Girl: I can do anything 4 u? Boy: Will you die for me? Girl: Yes. Boy: Will you delete ur Facebook account 4 me? Girl: Go home Bro, ur mother might be getting worried.
Facebook sms
Is there a way to make lots of money from Facebook??? Yes there is. . . . . . . Just . . . . . . . Logout and start working!
Height Of Facebook Update: “Suhaag Raat Hain Ghunghat Utha Raha Hoon Main” …………………….. 25 Likes, And…………….. 1 Comment, “Keep On Updating We Are Online“
Facebook sms
Similarity between FACEBOOK & JAIL: In both cases people sit, waste time and write on Walls!
Facebook sms
Dad joined facebook. Kid`s status update: "Dad on FB, wtf!" Dad commented, "What is wtf?" Kid replied him, "Welcome to Facebook!"
Facebook sms
FACEBOOK PAPER Q1 . Define add as friend ? Q2 . What does status means ? Q3 . What do u mean by poke ? Q4 . Give two reasons for liking the girls comments ? Q5 . What is pic tag ? Q6 . What is inbox msg ? Q7 . Give details of info ? Q8 . Draw a profile pic ? Q9 . What is page ? And why we prmote it . Give reasons ? Q10 . Define comments on post ?
Facebook sms
Girl's status on Facebook: "Feeling sad!" 17021 comments. . . Boy's status: "Going to commit suicide!" 2 likes and 1 comment-"Can I take your bike"!
Talent
Wat is d diff between Problem & Talent? 2 boys love 1 girl = Problem! 1 boy loves 2 girls = Talent!
Jokes
BOy To Girl: I Can Make U Say "I LOVE U" Girl : No Wayyy !! BOy : Bet?? GIrl : Yes BOy : Ok Start ... Say Blue? Girl : Blue BOy : Say Pink? Girl : Pink BOy : Say Love? Girl : Love BOy : Whats 1+1? Girl : 2 BOy : Ur Age? GIrl : 18 BOy : Hahaha... I TOld U I Cud Make U Say 18!! GIrl : No, U Said U Cud Make Me Say I LOVE U BOy : Yes I Did :D :D :D !!!
Sunday, September 9, 2012
Jokes
Several men are in the locker room of a golf club. When a cell phone on a bench rings, a man engages the hands-free speaker function and begins to talk.... MAN: "Hello" WOMAN: "Honey, it's me. Are you at the club?" MAN: "Yes." WOMAN: I am at the mall and found a beautiful leather coat. It's $1,000. Can I buy it?" MAN: "OK, go ahead if you like it that much." WOMAN: I also stopped by the Mercedes dealership and saw the 2002 models. I saw one I really liked." MAN: How much?" WOMAN: $60,000. MAN: "For that price I want it with all the options." WOMAN: "Great! One more thing. ... The house we wanted last year is back on the market. They're only asking $450,000." MAN: "Well, then go ahead and buy it but just offer $420,000." WOMAN: "OK. I'll see you later! I love you!" MAN: "Bye, I love you too." The man hangs up. The other men are looking at him in astonishment Then he asks: "Anyone know who this phone belongs to?"
Jokes
A woman awakes during the night to find that her husband was not in their bed. She puts on her robe and goes downstairs to look for him. She finds him sitting at the kitchen table with a cup of coffee in front him. He appears deep in thought, just staring at the wall. She watches as he wipes a tear from his eye and takes a sip of coffee. "What's the matter, dear?" she whispers as she steps into the room. "Why are you down here at this time of night?" The husband looks up, "Do you remember 20 years ago when we were dating, and you were only 17?" he asks solemnly. The wife is touched thinking her husband is so caring and sensitive. "Yes, I do," she replies. The husband pauses. The words are not coming easily. "Do you remember when you father caught us in the back seat of my car?" "Yes, I remember," says the wife, lowering herself into a chair beside him. The husband continues..."Do you remember when he shoved a shotgun in my face and said, "Either you marry my daughter, or I will send you to jail for 20 years". "I remember that too", she replies softly. He wipes another tear from his cheek and says... "I would have gotten out today!"
Jokes
A couple walking in the park noticed a young man and woman sitting on a bench, passionately kissing. "Why don't you do that?" said the wife. "Honey," replied her husband, "I don't even know that woman!
Jokes
The boss came early in the morning one day and found his manager kissing his secretary. He shouted at him, "Is this what I pay you for?" The manager replied: "No, sir, this I do free of charge."
Jokes
A group of girlfriends is on vacation when they see a 5-story hotel with a sign that reads: "For Women Only." Since they are without their boyfriends and husbands, they decide to go in. The bouncer, a very attractive guy, explains to them how it works. "We have 5 floors. Go up floor by floor, and once you find what you are looking for, you can stay there. It's easy to decide since each floor has a sign telling you what's inside." So they start going up and on the first floor the sign reads: "All the men on this floor are short and plain." The friends laugh and without hesitation move on to the next floor. The sign on the second floor reads: "All the men here are short and handsome." Still, this isn't good enough, so the friends continue on up. They reach the third floor and the sign reads: "All the men here are tall and plain." They still want to do better, and so, knowing there are still two floors left, they continued on up. On the fourth floor, the sign is perfect: "All the men here are tall and handsome." The women get all excited and are going in when they realize that there is still one floor left. Wondering what they are missing, they head on up to the fifth floor. There they find a sign that reads: "There are no men here. This floor was built only to prove that there is no way to please a woman."
Funny and cool
A Chinese couple had a new baby. The nurse brings over a lovely, healthy, bouncy, black baby boy. "Congratulations," says the nurse to the new parents. "What will you name the baby?" The puzzled father looks at his new baby boy and says, "I think we will name him Sum Ting Wong."
Funny and cool
How to Shower Like a Woman 1. Take off clothing and place it in sectioned laundry hamper according to lights and darks. 2. Walk to bathroom wearing long dressing gown. If you see husband along the way, cover up any exposed areas. 3. Look at your womanly physique in the mirror - make mental note to do more sit-ups 4. Get in the shower. Use face cloth, arm cloth, leg cloth, long loofah, wide loofah, and pumice stone. 5. Wash your hair once with cucumber and sage shampoo with 43 added vitamins. 6. Wash your hair again to make sure it's clean. 7. Condition your hair with grapefruit mint conditioner enhanced with natural avocado oil. Leave on hair for 15 minutes. 8. Wash your face with crushed apricot facial scrub for 10 minutes until red. 9. Wash entire rest of body with ginger nut and jaffa cake body wash. 10. Rinse conditioner off hair. 11. Shave armpits and legs. 12. Turn off shower. 13. Squeegee off all wet surfaces in shower. Spray mold spots with Tilex. 14. Get out of shower. Dry with towel the size of a small country. Wrap hair in super absorbent towel. 15. Check entire body for zits, tweeze hairs. 16. Return to bedroom wearing long dressing gown and towel on head. 17. If you see husband along the way, cover up any exposed areas. How To Shower Like a Man 1. Take off clothes while sitting on the edge of the bed and leave them in a pile. 2. Walk naked to the bathroom. If you see wife along the way, shake wiener at her making the 'woo-woo' sound. 3. Look at your manly physique in the mirror. Admire the size of your wiener and scratch your a**. 4. Get in the shower. 5. Wash your face 6. Wash your armpits. 7. Blow your nose in your hands and let the water rinse them off. 8. Make fart noises (real or artificial) and laugh at how loud they sound in the shower. 9. Spend majority of time washing privates and surrounding area. 10. Wash your butt, leaving those coarse butt hairs stuck on the soap. 11. Shampoo your hair. 12. Make a Shampoo Mohawk. 13. Pee. 14. Rinse off and get out of shower. 15. Partially dry off. Fail to notice water on floor because curtain was hanging out of tub the whole time. 16. Admire wiener size in mirror again. 17. Leave shower curtain open, wet mat on floor, light and fan on. 18. Return to bedroom with towel around your waist. If you pass wife, pull off towel, shake wiener at her and make the 'woo-woo' sound again. 19. Throw wet towel on bed.
Funny and cool
At the cocktail party, one woman said to another, "Aren't you wearing your wedding ring on the wrong finger?" The other replied, "Yes, I am, I married the wrong man."
Funny and cool
Any argument that a man and woman are involved in, the woman gets the last word. Anything a man says afterwards is the beginning of a new argument.
Funny and cool
A married couple was in a terrible accident where the woman's face was severely burned. The doctor told the husband that they couldn't graft any skin from her body because she was too skinny. So the husband offered to donate some of his own skin. However, the only skin on his body that the doctor felt was suitable would have to come from his buttocks. The husband and wife agreed that they would tell no one about where the skin came from, and requested that the doctor also honor their secret. After all, this was a very delicate matter. After the surgery was completed, everyone was astounded at the woman's new beauty. She looked more beautiful than she ever had before! All her friends and relatives just went on and on about her youthful beauty! One day, she was alone with her husband, and she was overcome with emotion at his sacrifice. She said, "Dear, I just want to thank you for everything you did for me. How can I possibly repay you?" "My darling," he replied, "I get all the thanks I need every time I see your mother kiss you on the cheek."
Funny and cool
Girls = time * money time = money, therefore: Girls = money * money (*) But we know that money is a root of all evil, thus: money = sqrt(evil) Taking into account (*), we have: Girls = sqrt(evil)*sqrt(evil) And finally: Girls = |evil| Thus, Girls are the absolute evil!
Funny jokes
A teenage girl had been talking on the phone for about half an hour, and then she hung up. "Wow!," said her father, "That was short. You usually talk for two hours. What happened?" "Wrong number," replied the girl.
Funny jokes
An Angry Wife To Her Husband 0n Phone: "Where d Hell Are You ...?" Husband: Darling You Remember That Jewellery Shop Where You Saw The Diamond Necklace n Totally Fell In Love With It n I Didn't Have Money That Time n I said "Baby It'll Be Yours 1 Day ... "O:) Wife, With A Smile & Blushing: Yeah I Remember That My Love! Husband: I ‘m in the Pub Just Next To That Shop
Funny jokes
How does a girl looks like wen she wears a seat belt in a car?? . . . . . . . . . . . . . . Like a percentage symbol. % :D
Funny jokes
Oh Grandma! A dying grandma tells her grandchild, "I want to leave you my farm. That includes the barn, livestock, the harvest, the tractor, and other equipment, the farmhouse and $24,548,750.45 in cash." The grandchild, absolutely floored and about to become rich says, "Oh grandma, you are SO generous! I didn't even know you had a farm. Where is it?" With her last breath, Grandma whispered, "Facebook..."
Funny jokes
Wife comes home late at night and quietly opens the door to her Bedroom. From under the blanket she sees four legs instead of two. She reaches for a Baseball Bat and starts hitting the blanket as hard as she can. Once she's done,she goes to the kitchen to have a drink. As she enters, she sees her husband there, reading a magazine. Husband says : "Hi Darling, Your parents have come to visit us, so let them stay in our bedroom. Hope you said Hello to them.." :-D
Funny jokes
Wife : I hate that beggar. Husband : Why? Wife : Rascal, yesterday I gave him food today he gave me a book "How to Cook" !!
Funny jokes
Teacher: Why are you late? Student: There was a man who lost a hundred dollar bill. Teacher: That's nice. Were you helping him look for it? Student: No. I was standing on it.
Funny
Money isn't everything but it sure keeps you in touch with your children. _J. Paul Getty_ A man explained inflation to his wife thus: 'When we married, you measured 36-24-36. Now you're 42-42-42. There's more of you, but you are not worth as much.' _Lord Barnett_ Some people get so rich they lose all respect for humanity. That's how rich I want to be. _Rita Rudner_ If you want to know what God thinks of money, just look at the people he gave it to. _Dorothy Parker_ My problem lies in reconciling my gross habits with my net income. _Errol Flynn_
Funny
Why did God create men? Because vibrators can't mow the lawn. _Madonna_ All men are not homeless, but some men are home less than others. _Henry Youngman_ To attract men, I wear a perfume called 'New Car Interior'. _Rita Rudner_ This guy says, 'I'm perfect for you, because I'm a cross between a macho and a sensitive man.' I said, 'Oh, a gay trucker?' _Judy Tenuta_ Women speak because they wish to speak, whereas a man speaks only when driven to speech by something outside himself -- like, for instance, he can't find any clean socks. _Jean Kerr_ Women now have choices. They can be married, not married, have a job, not have a job, be married with children, unmarried with children. Men have the same choice we've always had: work or prison. _Tim Allen_ I love men, even though they're lying, cheating scumbags. _Gwyneth Paltrow_
Funny
To solve the human equation, we need to add love, subtract hate, multiply good, and divide between truth and error. _Janet Coleman_ The 50-50-90 rule: Anytime you have a 50-50 chance of getting something right, there's a 90% probability you'll get it wrong. _Andy Rooney_ The day after tomorrow is the third day of the rest of your life. _George Carlin_ If all the world's a stage, I want to operate the trap door. -- Paul Beatty In life, it's not who you know that's important, it's how your wife found out. _Joey Adams_
Funny
I recently read that love is entirely a matter of chemistry. That must be why my wife treats me like toxic waste. _David Bissonnette_ I've been in love with the same woman for forty-one years. If my wife finds out, she'll kill me. _Henry Youngman_ It's better to have loved and lost than to do forty pounds of laundry a week. _Laurence J. Peter_ If love is blind, why is lingerie so popular? _Unknown_ If love is the answer, could you rephrase the question? _Lily Tomlin_ Love is the delightful interval between meeting a beautiful girl and discovering that she looks like a haddock. _John Barrymore_ Love is an irresistible desire to be irresistibly desired. _Robert Frost_ A kiss can be a comma, a question mark or an exclamation point. That's basic spelling that every woman ought to know. _Mistinguette_ Absence -- that common cure of love. _Miguel De Cervantes_
Coolll
Full Form Of BOYS? 'B'uffalo 'O'f 'Y'outh 'S'ociety.. GIRL means? 'G'lories 'I'n 'R'eal 'L'ife.. Send to All Sweet girls & buffalo boys.
Coolll
Brain Teaser: If 2 hours ago it was as long after one o'clock in the afternoon as it was before one o'clock in the morning. What time would it be now?
Coolll
We think there is enough time to live! But we never know which moment will be our last.. So Love..Care..Share.& Celebrate every moment :(;(
Coolll
Mumbai daily lingo : A ailaa B bhendi C chindi D dhasu E ekdam F fadoo G ghanta H hailaa I item J jhol K kalti L lapet , lafda M maa kasam , maal N nautanki , naatak O oye P phut chal Q qeeda R raapchik S shaanpati T tapori U ukhad V vaat W wohich X xhun Y yeda Z zakaas
Coolll
Scientists Have Proved that there are 6155756148910 PeopLe in the World who r 2 LAZY 2 Read the above Number.. Now Don't Laugh at urSelf.. gud-morning!.
Coolll
Attention: Whomsoever I've ever irritated knowingly or by mistake. . .. Whatever I've done in the past was just a trailer, Baby! Watch out the future!
Wednesday, September 5, 2012
Love
If you want a Boy 2 Love you 4 a lifetime, Love His Heart not his Money. If u want a Girl 2 Lov u 4 a Lifetime,Lov Her Soul not her Body :-)
Love
Do u kw wt is LOVE? LOVE is lyk a favorite sng dat u play.. Over and over.. Dis 1 sng makes u happy, sad and may b even mad, But Even then U still press repeat.
Jokes
What is the intresting thing in tom n jerry..? . . . . Pura din nange ghumenge , or jab nahane ke liye jayenge to swimming suit pehan ke jayenge !:-D
Jokes
Dhoni is 29 yrs n wife Sakshi is 21 yrs.. . but stil Dhoni says . we were school friends. . Crazy fellow! . 10th me 1st std ki ladki ko line marta tha saala !
Jokes
Effect of IPL .. (in a maternity hospital)Child's father : Doc, is it a gal or a boy??Doc : Well, first of all, Congratulations , it's a citi moment of success, so u can relax and take a max mobile time out. u know, I almost dropped the kid on the ground, but then the nurse took a Karbonn kamaal catch and the kid is alive.. n to ur question of the kid being a gal or a boy, well all I can say is, he is a DLF Maximum..:P:P
Jokes
Height Of Insult : . . Guide : I welcome u all to niagra falls. this is the world's largest waterfall and the sound intensity of the waterfall is so high that even 20 supersonic planes passing by can't be heard! . . . . . . Now may I Request the LADIES to keep quiet so that we can hear The Niagra Falls..!!
Jokes
A married man was having an affair with his secretary. One day they went 2 her place & made love all afternoon. Exhausted, they fell asleep & woke up at 8 pm. The man hurriedly dressed & told his lover 2 take his shoes outside & rub them in the grass & dirt. He then put on his shoes & drove home. 'Where have u been?' his wife demanded. 'I can't lie 2u,' he replied, 'I'm havin an affair wit my secretary. We had sex all afternoon. She looked down at his shoes & said: 'You are lying bastard! You've been playing golf! Moral: Women are women. Truth or lies, they'll never believe u !
Tamil jokes
Tamil SMS LKG Boy: Dai Machan Examukku bit eduthudu poniye ennachu? Boy 2; Ady poda bita jattila vachu eduthudu ponen. Atha maranthudu jattila ucha poitten.
Tamil jokes
Sachin century Adicha. "Stadum Full". Rajini padam Nadicha. "Theatre Full" Thalla S.M.S. anupuna unga "INBOX FULL"
Tamil jokes
"LOVE" pani "NASAMA" Porathai Vida.! "SIGHT" Adichu "SANTHOSAMA" Irunga.! Its my big advice for you.! ippadikku... Best friend
Teacher's day
you are not only our teacher our friend , philosopher and guide to all modled into one person We will always be grateful to you for your support. HAPPY TEACHERS DAY
Teacher's day
T- Teachers, are like candles, E- Every inch they consum, A- Are stars for students, C- Cheerful and kind, H- Helpful and fine, E- Extra-ordinarily, R- Ready to, S- Shine,
Teacher's day
The way you teach... The knowledge you share... The care you take... The love you shower.. Makes you... The world's best teacher... Happy Teacher's Day!
Computer jokes
Dear God, Yesterday was an awful day for me.. My husband ran off with his secretary. My son pierced his eyebrow. My daughter tattooed the bald spot on her head. My dog mated with the neighbours cat. My neighbour sold her house to a mental institution. My Mom told me I was adopted. My boss told me I was laid off. My sister was arrested for prostitution. My house has termites. My car was stolen. All that came in the mail was bills. A plane crash landed on my garage. OJ Simpson came to my door selling rug cleaner. And my TV blew. Lord, please be with me today. I was able to live through all that misery yesterday. And I will be able to make it through anything today! But please.... DON'T LET ANYTHING HAPPEN TO MY COMPUTER!
Computer jokes
There was a doctor, a civil engineer, and a computer scientist sitting around late one evening, and they got to discussing which was the oldest profession. The doctor pointed out that according to Biblical tradition, God created Eve from Adam's rib. This obviously required surgery, so therefore that was the oldest profession in the world. The engineer countered with an earlier passage in the Bible that stated that God created order from the chaos, and that was most certainly the biggest and best civil engineering example ever, and also proved that his profession was the oldest profession. The computer scientist leaned back in her chair, and with a sly smile responded, "Yes, but who do you think created the chaos?"
Computer jokes
Computer users are divided into three types: Novice, Intermediate and Expert. Novice Users - People who are afraid that simply pressing a key might break their computer. Intermediate Users - People who don't know how to fix their computer after they've just pressed a key that broke it. Expert Users - People who press the keys that break other people's computers.
Sunday, September 2, 2012
Relationships
Time can make us forget some memories. But there r some memories which make us forget time. And those memories make life sweeter.
Relationships
A very true saying - Relationships aren't perfect. Perfection is when you and I can go through anything and still stand strong together. Wiser. and more in love than imaginable . If i had to choose between loving you and breathing, I'd use my last breath to say i love you because i wouldn't be able to live without you .. As time goes on .. The taste of relation increases .. Either it becomes more sweet or more salty & it depends upon what you add to it Deep emotions come out from heart , but the deepest emotions come out from eyes as tears.. so show it only to those who worth it .
Relationships
No Matter How Many Times The Teeth Bite The Tongue.. Stil They Stay Together In The Same Mouth.. That's The Spirit Of FORGIVENESS!!
Relationships
Relationships are harder now because conversations became texting , arguments became phone calls , feelings became subliminal messages online. Sex became easy , the word "love" gets used out of context , insecurities have become your way of thinking. Getting jealous became a habit , trust has been lost , cheating became an accident, leaving became the only option & being hurt became natural .
Love
"The love which U go in search of, May expect a lot of things from U !!! But the love that comes Ur way, Expects nothing other than U..! Gud mng !!
Cool
1 admi k 3 dost the Teeno doctor the.. 2 pagal the 1 ko samjh ni thi.. Jis ko samj ni thi Us k 3 hospital the 2 band the 1 khulta ni tha.. Jo khulta ni tha us me 3 fans the 2 band the 1 chalta ni tha.. Jo chalta ni tha, us ko 3 mechanic k pas le gye 2 ko kam ata ni tha 1 se hota ni tha.. Jis se hota ni tha Us k 3 shagird the 2 aate ni the 1 ghr me rhta tha.. Jo ghar me rahta tha Wo wohi shuru wala admi tha jis k 3 dost the.. Mere b 3 dost the 2 pagal ho gaye or 1 abi ho raha hai.. Lonely again
Cool
"Attraction is The Temporary Love." But "Love is permanent Attraction." Just a Game of Words But Makes Lot of Difference in Life..!!
Cool
Brain Teaser: If 2 hours ago it was as long after one o'clock in the afternoon as it was before one o'clock in the morning. What time would it be now?
Cool
We think there is enough time to live! But we never know which moment will be our last.. So Love..Care..Share.& Celebrate every moment :(;(
Life
Life is More Strict than TEACHER, A Teacher Teaches Lesson and Then keep Exam But Life keep the Exam First and Then Teaches the Lessons.. Gud Morning Gud Day
Life
It was a Sports Stadium. 8 girls were standing on a track for racing. Ready! Steady! Bang! With sound of Pistol all girls started running. Hardly they had covered 10 to 15 steps, 1 girl slipped & fell. Due to pain she started crying. When other 7 Girls heard her all STOPPED running, STOOD 4 a while, turned BACK & RAN towards her. All 7 Girls LIFTED the Girl, pacified her, joined hands togather, walked together & reached WINNING Post. Officials were shocked. Many Eyes were filled with tears. It happened recently. Racing was conducted by National Institute of Mental Health. All participants were Mentally RETARDED. What did they teach? Teamwork, Humanity, Sportsman spirit Love Care & Equality We Surely can NEVER Do this, because we have Brains.
Life
A short quote "Many times in lyf, Realization is of no worth 2 us Coz, it cmes after we have Lost sumthing important !!! ":( Gd evng
Life
Feel our CHILDHOOD . I want 2 go back to d time wen"Innocence"was "Natural", wen "Getin high" meant "On a swing", wen "Drinking" meant "Rasna", . wen "Dad" was d only "Hero", . wen "Love" was "Mom's hug", . wen "Dad's shoulder" was d "The highest place on earth",, wen d only thing Tht cud . "Hurt" wer "Bleeding knees", . wen d only things "Broken" wer "Toys", n wen "Goodbyes" only meant "Till 2moro" Life has changed a lot..isn't it..?
Friendship
Night is lucky because moon is hers. Sky is lucky because it has stars. Rose is lucky because she is red. I am lucky because you are my good friend
Friendship
A friendship can weather most things and thrive in thin soil; but it needs a little mulch of letters and phone calls and small, silly presents every so often just to save it from drying out completely.
Funny
I hate plagiarism, it's stealing ideas from one person. I love to research, I steal from many people
Funny
A SMS sent by a Man 2 his wife: 'Hi Honey, I am just having my last beer, & I will be home in 30 minutes. If I am not, please read this SMS again!'
Jokes
A blonde gets home early frm shoppng n hears strange noises coming frm d bedrm. She rushes upstairs to find her husband naked on d bed,sweatng n pantng. Whats up?she asks. I m havng a heart attack,cries d husband. The blonde rushes dwnstairs to grab d phone,bt jst as she's diallng, her four yr son comes up n says, mummy!mummy!aunt Shirley is hidng in ur closet,n she's got no clothes on! The blonde slams d phone dwn n storms upstairs into d bedrm,rt past her husband,n rips open d closet door. Sure enough,there is her sister,totally naked n cowering on the closet floor. U rotten Bitch,she screams. My husband's havng a hrt attk n u r running around naked scaring the kids!haha